“Teapot,” say my ole man, "corse we orl hev nicknearmes where Oi dew cum frum." “Oh, ar - an' where dew yew cum frum then, moi good man?” say St Peter. “Sherinum,” say my ole man. “Wuh – not the Sherinum in Norfick?” say St Peter. “Woi, yis,” say my ole man, "hev yew hard onnit?" “Not the Rev Fitch’s Sherinum?” say St Peter. “Yis, thass roite,” say my ole man. “Dew yew cum on in roite away, bor,” say St Peter. “We don’t git many o’ Rev Fitch’s in hare!” * * * In Norfolk there are four kinds of 'bare': the bare you see in the zoo, the bare you are when you haven't any clothes on, the bare you get in the pub and the bare they carry you on when you are dead. They are all pronounced the same, although they may be spelt: bear, bare, beer and bier! * * * * * * The parson, in willage next to where Oi wus born, useter tearke the bell-ringers for a day's outin' to the seaside, wi' the ringers bein' mainly farm-workers.
Arter arrival at the seaside, the morning wus spent hevin' a gander round, and learter we orl met at a restrunt for the mid-day wittles. As Oi recall ut, the fust course finished and the puddun' cum along, complete wi' spoon and fork. One old boy, nexter me at the tearble say: "Wos the fork for, bor?" "Ter fill yer spoon with," Oi told him. 'Well, there yar, bor," he replied, "an' all moi yares wot Oi're warked on the farm, Oi're nivver evver hed a fork to fill my spearde with afore!"
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Boy Albie
Norfolk born and bred. Archives
August 2020
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